A Boy in My Belly

Since week 13, things have been getting better and better. I'm back to eating mostly raw: green juices and fruit during the day, big salads in the evening. That's really helped with the constipation and gas. I do include baked potatoes, chickpeas, tofu or other cooked foods in the evening with my salad, but only when I want them. For me, listening to my body is key. And the pregnancy seems to be going pretty well; I feel good, no problems. I work out 3 or 4 times a week on the elliptical trainer, lift weights. I'm about 20 weeks now, still wearing my own clothes for the most part, but of course rocking a little belly at the same time.

We decided to give birth at a birthing center -- rather than a full-on hospital ward -- because you're able to be a little more in control there. To do it, we started seeing a team of midwives, one of whom will be with us throughout the birth.

Seeing a midwife is different than seeing a doctor. They don't make you wait as long for your appointments, and they tend to do tests by touch rather than with machinery. For example, the midwife I saw took my blood pressure by hand and felt my belly to see the baby's size rather than using an in-office ultrasound. That's fine with me. I'd be happy to get out of the other chemical/tech tests, too. But apparently I still have to do the glucose test -- which involves drinking some awful, neon orange artificial sugar crap -- in order to use the birthing center. I said I'd like to see if there's any way around that, and they said they'd try... but no promises. That gunk cannot be good for me or my baby. Why do doctors always want to do what's most convenient for them instead of what's best for the patient? Seriously, that's what I see.

A couple of days ago, we went for the 20 week ultrasound and found out we're having a boy. Exciting! But also something to absorb and think about. It raises some questions for us -- will we have a baptism? a bris? What's a good name? So... thoughts. He just does his own thing, doesn't respond to sounds or pokes really. But he's very active, and I feel him often.

I'm almost done with school now, so my life should be a lot less hectic in three weeks. Three! I can't believe I'm almost done. I'm really ready to put it behind me, so it's not a moment too soon.

So far -- pregnancy is different than I expected but not as bad as I feared! I'll wait to see what happens in the coming weeks.

Raw Heat in the Snow

Whew! I've been silent a long time -- I had terrible morning sickness (as well as full-time work and full-time school) for several weeks and then a bout of the flu. It was chaos! Luckily, my surprisingly responsible and nice husband took care of me and cleaned up the house and was generally a brick. I got back into the raw zone a couple of weeks ago, and am feeling pretty good again. I haven't been taking my supplements, though, which I worry about. I hate them, and I don't like to ingest lab-produced materials because current medical fashion dictates it. On the other hand -- I'm a vegan, and I don't want to harm my baby. What to do?

Today we had a massive snowstorm, so I'm home from work with almost no food in the house. I looked around and found that I had most of the ingredients for this kooky soup, Siamese Dream Thai Curry Soup. It's just coconut water with healthy doses of lemon juice, olive oil, soy sauce (I used Bragg's Liquid Aminos), ginger, curry, and garlic. (I left out the garlic, because I'm still dealing with an aversion to it.) Anyway, you blend it up, then chop up whatever you have around -- mushrooms, greens, basil, tomato, avocado -- and just dump that in. It's fabulous! Also very warming and exotic on a snowstorm day. I spooned it up, dreaming of Thailand, and barely noticed the snowblowers grumbling outside.

I've been drinking a lot of coconut water recently -- this started after I got the flu, because I needed to protect against dehydration -- and I'm having a mixed experience. It tends to have a laxative and diuretic effect, which I guess is good during pregnancy. But too much upsets my stomach. So my advice to pregnant ladies is: enjoy coconut water, but only a glass or two each day.

The GYN said everything looks good with the pregnancy so far: low risk of chromosomal abnormality according to the non-invasive screening, my blood pressure and cholesterol and folic acid are in good shape, etc. He's worried about my B12 and D levels... should I take the supplements?

No Longer Raw

I can't call myself a raw food person anymore. My nausea has been so bad for the past few days that I've been eating only rice crackers and soda water. Sucks! It does help the nausea, though. Hopefully, when I feel better, I can go back to my berries and juices and salads. They say the sickness doesn't usually last past 13 weeks, and I'm midway through my 11th week now -- according to my calculations. I still haven't seen the GYN!

Listing my diet would be too boring, so I'll just comment that I'm very nauseated and tired, especially since school started up again. I'm beginning to have a little belly, too. Hello in there!

Can't Stand Up for Falling Down

For the past two days, I have been eating CRAP. I mean, junky, greasy, refined foods. I don't know what's come over me. I'm nauseated most of the day, just mildly, and then I get so hungry at night that I eat these horrific foods.

Friday:
blueberries
Bosc pear
green juice (vitamin)
Saag paneer with saffron rice and papadam (what???)

Saturday:
Cherries
apple
green juice (vitamin)
Pad Kee Mao with sticky rice and two summer rolls (what????!!!)

I woke up today feeling stuffy, queasy, gassy and gross. No more.

Recommendations: I've been reading the blog of "Doctor Ariel," who does all those Women Go Raw videos. Lots of info, worth reading. Mostly, though, I'm just bogged down in school-work and work-work. My goal is to get through the next two weeks.

The nitty gritty: sometimes I feel little pulls or cramps or something -- I can't tell if it's gas from the greasy take-out or if it's something pregnancy related. I just put my hand on it and say (inside) "Stay with me. I got you." I don't know what that's supposed to accomplish. But when I'm running, and I look out over the river or the gardens, I say (inside): "We will see all this together, you and me." Of course, we haven't done the check for chromosomal abnormalities, so you're really not supposed to become attached or make long-term plans. But... I am human. This is what I do.

Down, Down, Down

I've been dealing with a lot of nausea lately... it's very hard. I don't know who came up with the idea that women shouldn't tell about their pregnancies until the second trimester. All that means is that we have to work full-time and support everyone else's needs while feeling like dirt. Bad deal!

So, obviously I'm a little grouchy. With the nausea, the easiest things to eat are very plain things: berries, lettuce with oil and vinegar, etc. I can't get my juice down -- or my vitamins, which is worse -- but I'm doing my best.

Yesterday's choices:

bag frozen blueberries
2 bosc pears
1/2 tomato, 1/2 cucumber
gazpacho (tomato, cucumber, pepper soup with avocado)
2 brown rice cakes with avocado
some white rice (ugh! why did I do that?)

The white rice was a big mistake -- I couldn't sleep at all tonight. Oh well.

Recommendations: I found another raw pregnancy blog: Courtney Taylor on Loving Raw. Unfortunately, there are only little pieces of the story, not the whole thing.

The nitty gritty: I'm feeling super nauseated and tired lately, and also crazy grouchy. I hope this all clears up soon. I had to push back my first doctor's appointment, so I won't be checked until I'm in my 12th week. That seems really late to me. On the other hand, I'm not having any pain or spotting, so maybe I should be glad that I can just let things develop for a while before all the tests and poking.

Measuring Cups

Just got back from my GP, who tells me that my B12 and D levels are low. He recommended:

4 of my DHA softgels per day
3000 units of vitamin D per day (until late spring)
1000 mcg of methylcobalamin (B12) per day

That's in addition to my 3 prenatal vitamins. Yuck! I hate taking so many supplements. I wish doctors would tell me what foods to eat, rather than which pills to take. On the other hand, for vitamin D, b12 and DHA, they'd probably tell me salmon and milk -- which is not what I usually do.

All in all, though, my health is good! My folic acid is off the charts (I'm blushing with pride), cholesterol is low and primarily good cholesterol, no HIV, no illness, and HCG levels suggest that conception happened right after Thanksgiving.

Today's intake:

1 green juice (20 oz)
1 vitamin cap
bosc pear
green apple
banana
bag frozen blueberries (brrrr!)

Now I've just got to hang in until next week's visit with the GYN. 7 days to go, baby!

Get Back to Where You Once Belonged

Lately, I've been riding the U.S.S. Queasy, and in response I've been incorporating more cooked foods into my diet and eating a lot more. Dumb response! It makes me grouchy. I've also developed aversions to foods that I used to like: tea, raw corn and collards, for example. Sad!

Here were yesterday's food choices (no judgments!):

2 green juices with lemon and ginger
2 vitamins, spaced throughout the day
Mutsu apple
salad with olives, artichoke hearts, carrots, celery, tomato
cucumber/avocado roll (brown rice)
can of organic mixed beans
raw meal: chili, salad, nut pate wrap
5 rice cakes with olive oil

It could be worse, but I feel really gross, gassy and ill. I also have a little headache and extra tiredness from going off tea. Lovely.

Recommendations: I bought a few books about pregnancy over 35: Your Over-35 Week-by-Week Pregnancy Guide by Kelly Shanahan and Healthy Pregnancy Over 35 by Laura Goetzl. Both were useful, especially in terms of clarifying the risks and benefits of pre-natal testing.

More on chromosomal abnormalities and testing: I learned that, at my age (almost 40), the risk for having a child with a chromosomal abnormality is about 1.5%, with the risk of having a child with Down's Syndrome at about .8%.

These risk levels are based on all women my age, though. In order to get a more accurate risk level for my pregnancy, I would have a blood test and an ultrasound to measure the nuchal translucency (a transparency at the back of the neck) of the fetus. You can do this at any point from 11-14 weeks. The measurements of specific blood levels and the gap at the back of the fetus's neck will help the doctor to assign a risk level that not only applies to your age group, but also to your particular situation. There is no risk to doing this sort of test. Based on these measurements, about 25% of women my age will test "positive" for chromosomal abnormality -- that just means that the odds are greater than 1 in 250 or .4%. So most women who test positive are still not going to have a chromosomal abnormality, but they are at high risk.

If you're at high risk (or even if you're not), you can find out for sure if there are abnormalities through an invasive test. You can do an early test (CVS), which carries with it a 1% chance of miscarriage, or a later test (amniocentesis), which carries a .5% change of miscarriage. The early test can be done at 10 weeks, and the later test can be done at 15-18 weeks. So, you just have to weigh the risks and make the decision that feels safest to you.

Chromosomal abnormalities appear when the unfertilized egg has an extra chromosome. It's just a glitch that, like most glitches, happens increasingly with age. Some abnormalities lead to painful, brief lives for the child; some lead to more manageable situations. Once you know the prognosis, it's really your choice.

The nitty gritty: grouchy! queasy! tired! Working out and drinking green juice help, but I don't always get to do that. It's so irritating that, at this point, I really need some slack at work, but I can't tell anyone that I need it. Plus, my breasts have gone National Geographic on me. But all in all, I have to be grateful that I've made it this far. If I can get to tomorrow, I'll have completed 8 weeks! 25% of women my age miscarry, and 80% of those miscarry in the first 8 weeks... so once you get to 9 or 10 weeks, your chances of miscarriage go down to about 5%.

Of course, statistics don't mean anything on an individual level. But I still take comfort from the illusion of measurable, manageable risk.